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/ x* O- N h7 _4 r2 p* E楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">时间：8 |9 J* f& B0 smso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">2014" {$ d' H$ v+ d# R$ mmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">年8月12日
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7 y/ J7 t) h7 N4 P楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">地点：/ I& j. t# ], u- Y
mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">老秘网“文稿修改演播室”（QQ群号：366351120）
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楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">主讲：) ?# D. _' R+ y _* }7 D3 ?
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楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">整理：" v8 x! G+ {( k) V! ]mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">杨苏
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1 D0 ?- Z X6 M" v! a5 J楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">具体内容：
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mso-hansi-font-family:方正小标宋简体;mso-bidi-font-family:方正小标宋简体;color:black;- Z2 D" I* L5 S2 r- K2 @, a0 a, o# `6 J
mso-font-kerning:0pt">一、对一篇汇报材料的讨论
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line-height:30.0pt;mso-line-height-rule:exactly">+ K' I. n7 W- D T& {font-family:黑体;mso-hansi-font-family:黑体;mso-bidi-font-family:黑体">老猫：某市美丽乡村创建工作情况汇报，大家帮某同学推敲一组标题，如何？
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h: n2 C6 b3 c2 Tline-height:30.0pt;mso-line-height-rule:exactly">4 Z8 G- V( b# ^/ f"Times New Roman"">（一）立足转型强村，打造宜业乡村。
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"Times New Roman"">（二）坚持“五水共治”，打造宜人乡村
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7 ]3 H2 y( H3 b1 t5 j0 n; Iline-height:30.0pt;mso-line-height-rule:exactly">+ u( e# a8 O: I/ O! i" v"Times New Roman"">（三）着眼增收致富，打造宜农乡村。
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% _( O" `" j. hline-height:30.0pt;mso-line-height-rule:exactly">1 X0 `# m! }( |$ U" c' x) {0 ?8 n O4 a"Times New Roman"">（四）突出民生保障，打造宜居乡村。
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line-height:30.0pt;mso-line-height-rule:exactly">5 [4 T6 J3 o4 Q1 l. Cfont-family:仿宋_GB2312;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;
+ d& }3 B$ [6 v) D+ Y+ z! dmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">魅力乡村，幸福乡村、宜居乡村、富裕乡村之类的，我的意思是用一根线串起来，让这组小标题形成一个整体。. E3 w V" t$ i
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: X' o+ F/ x: z6 m9 \2 e z% m Pline-height:30.0pt;mso-line-height-rule:exactly">: I) I6 a4 K2 |3 l- U& H9 s3 D14.0pt;font-family:楷体_GB2312;mso-hansi-font-family:楷体_GB2312;mso-bidi-font-family:
: K+ V( T' J3 R, l8 ]( p/ N楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">端方：7 i- a+ @1 @* g3 B+ ]- v/ Omso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">标题分两部分，前半部分亮手段（做法），后半部分凸显成效。四个乡村的思路不错，但内容上缺少支撑，建议再从内容上面抓取下逻辑。另外，感觉题目不足以体现内容。. g5 c& U- F/ y0 ]% q- d' F
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# |% e4 G) f, C: ~% V楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">胡晓斌： [3 z% u, Y! U! g1 ~) C, b6 Smso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">嗯，内容来讲有并列的，也有逻辑递进关系，不知如何把握。1 d4 O* v5 F0 J9 P" \9 l
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楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">霞光：# x/ {( I9 o, d7 `' n
mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">民生保障作为出发点，惠农增收作为增长点呢! P$ N2 z) a' J# S# Mmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">,/ [7 ~7 B2 `) K2 N+ g9 k
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U; O* B& v% v7 E W! W) M* s宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">妥否2 K8 P& l& {) c+ }; V1 J! y
mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">?
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3 T5 h8 D: p% V/ M$ Q; h) F' p/ N( Z楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">杨苏:+ v1 r4 [8 |0 ^6 }% {mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">感觉民生保障包括很多方面，不只是宜居。宜居一般是和生态环境放在一起的，民生保障一般和和谐、幸福搭配在一起。$ W+ t7 k# J$ D' X/ I( Y
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* a0 H4 o- m0 L, D5 T& _! a; Q楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">北纬30度：: ^. y# ?* J1 q* S, v$ l+ _
mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">顺序调整一下，环境放最后。不知道第一点内容。2 f, T4 Y- O& _& s: w# J5 u
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宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">一、三任书记接力干，一张蓝图抓创建3 k# [. B: `1 e6 R) ?! ~6 L7 g
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仿宋_GB2312;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">2) N q3 N* G3 c* X, O; E仿宋_GB2312;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:
; G% x3 \8 |/ z& Z! f" K5 K宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">、规划引领明方向。1 P! _- g h( |* F
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仿宋_GB2312;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">3. t j" h# o8 K$ g$ i0 m仿宋_GB2312;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:
- n+ v2 v6 ?5 V* |5 H: ~* ~宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">、政策支撑强保障。. r7 n/ P: n: N( Q
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6 _8 A& J% f5 O* }3 h' C* V t6 o2 v* B, iline-height:30.0pt;mso-line-height-rule:exactly">4 f/ K7 W8 {& P0 i) S1 }2 f0 T仿宋_GB2312;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">42 ^ r4 A- D. B: L3 e- l9 k$ P. ?
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宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">、健全机制促落实。/ g& F% U: J0 r- N: T7 {仿宋_GB2312;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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5 }1 g, w) r( L) |: L/ P8 u: `
line-height:30.0pt;mso-line-height-rule:exactly">0 h E# h4 q/ _ `: I0 |; L1 N宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">二、十年时间抓整治，美丽乡村显成效. S; M( w( x, D5 z0 q5 l2 P7 cfont-family:宋体;mso-fareast-font-family:仿宋_GB2312;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;, }7 @/ @) K; I5 b! x
mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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: c, L6 ~, A5 w7 L Uline-height:30.0pt;mso-line-height-rule:exactly">1 S( L* y# E2 {# X宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">（一）坚持把转型强村作为美丽乡村建设的5 r9 q T/ z( dfont-family:宋体;mso-fareast-font-family:仿宋_GB2312;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">重头戏' M: t* W# D' V0 B& Q5 R9 O- }
font-family:宋体;mso-fareast-font-family:仿宋_GB2312;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;
: j1 u- E) o+ d& j8 z' ]mso-font-kerning:0pt">”1 }3 P& {3 R4 O. z; t4 A, I
mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，乡村发展水平有效提升。5 R6 X/ {% L2 p7 l; ? d; j5 K# u
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line-height:30.0pt;mso-line-height-rule:exactly"> y% R/ Q: M+ E7 M% L. s8 _% b9 t, i仿宋_GB2312;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt"> 11 U8 B; H" Y3 B$ s! T( ] I宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">、依靠主体强动力。) {: f/ x* v% K! yfont-family:宋体;mso-fareast-font-family:仿宋_GB2312;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;
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宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">、产村联动促增收。! m5 Q4 n/ j4 K( ]' Z4 u7 d
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# k% `- k2 `% t* [宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">个村联合建立五星社区，集聚人口3 f! A2 C6 G4 L* y9 M" _' [) Smso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">2500! b$ L: P: a% s; d' lmso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">多人，盘活建设用地9 |# }, ?. b: ^) C' M x: b
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5 L8 f6 t. I8 n* I: x- ^! n楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">端方:1 d6 @# {8 w# H5 o( Mmso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">用是可以用，问题不在这里。这个材料感觉像是工作总结，挂了个美丽乡村的头，较牵强。. C* G8 y; a' ]* E/ ?- A6 g
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楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">端方：0 \# [, X7 D- t: f# Hmso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">我不是这个意思，美丽乡村汇报也好，生态乡村汇报也好，这些内容都可以用。一个汇报材料第一是基本情况，第二是对于创建活动本身的相关情况汇报，第三是做法，第四适当点点问题。当然，问题也可以根据实际情况不点。至于你的措施，应该是结合本情况来的。而且此提纲里，做法没有必要分这么多层次，容易造成逻辑上的混乱。你先要明确出这么几个重点。比如，要说转型，你想表达的转型是什么转型，怎么转型，转出什么成效，结合美丽乡村落到优化产业结构上比较好。, J% g2 Y$ [# z8 L& n
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楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">端方:# Z M- {5 b) @ a* V9 Umso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">不是多，是乱了。我看完的体会是包罗万象，但具体内容看完却记不住多少。* t0 `" ~( w/ ^* g) Gmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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5 w" R. l2 e$ M( S. w2 @% I- ?: o楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">飘雪:* A# W0 G0 z+ X G2 o( q9 |mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">层次可以简化，什么都想说，太杂了。- V9 I" W* n& |+ c9 G7 t. amso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">不过不是不能说，要理顺一下。举个例子来说，就用猫总凝练的题目（一）坚持把转型强村作为美丽乡村建设的/ ~; Z6 z3 s( X1 ]
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宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，乡村发展水平有效提升。这个标题要写，要明确围绕的中心是转型强村。效果是乡村发展水平。对应转型强村找内容。2 S- c X7 t8 N9 A' i1 @
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8 Y1 A; N7 d5 b! o4 ?6 O. b9 Z1 @楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">北纬30度:( t5 `+ _+ X* Q, V
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mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">我发表一下个人的想法，有以下几个方面的建议：一是老秘并不了解学员工作的具体环境和具体情况，如果要这样一对一的修改，是需要花费一些时间慢慢对接的；二是就本文来说存在一些逻辑问题，可能是在撰稿之初就犯了一些逻辑性错误，观点（小标题）是根据内容提炼出来的，而本文的小标题对仗工整，乍一看给人的感觉是比较好，但一看内容就有点文不对题了。例如：第一部分，作为乡级政府谈何政策支持？乡镇有制定政策的权限吗？$ `/ n0 I3 k) p) B7 i
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">我们是县级市，不是乡镇。 _, t% J/ j! H- a2 k6 G( w
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7 |1 c1 P9 J% M) k5 a5 l( l/ \楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">胡晓斌:% G/ N z6 H. }/ q3 emso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">县级市应该有制定本县美丽乡村建设实施意见和考核标准、政策支持等权力的吧。二级标题与子标题脱节。- n! Z! i/ Y- h. C3 V6 `
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楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">端方:$ d! A" p1 l c5 q: Wmso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">即便乡镇没有制定政策的权限，但也可以出台一些举措，比如以奖代补，纳入考核。这些可以归入政策层面。, q! T! @3 h( ~3 h" H
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对，这个问题我同意。而且这也不是核心问题。核心问题可能还是逻辑架构上。我觉得晓斌对转型可能没有理解透。1 q, z8 [2 j+ C7 S$ P9 R
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">这篇六大点，有点多，整合下。2 ~9 F7 T: g8 R3 Y# B9 t. A
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">二、列提纲、明思路. M) N# n) z; ?- x8 A* k
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( B0 t/ s$ C+ @, c楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">端方:# b8 } u: X u1 c4 T) L1 lmso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">在刚才讨论的基础上，我想谈一谈关于列提纲的一点体会。我所理解的提纲就是动笔之前想好的内容，材料的骨架，也是我们通常所说的谋篇布局。8 B9 }- d8 O0 ~5 G2 j
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楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">端方:如果反过来，写加强社区制度建设，对93向社区制度进行梳理，非常平，看不出什么特色与亮点来。
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楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">铁树凝:需求为王，刨树刨根，循此，深挖，梳理片段，轮廓，佐以素材，碰撞，修正思路，揉融观点素材，思路为纲，纲举目张，终是符合有关要求，才算好。
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2 V9 F8 ~5 s* ?7 r) @' r楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">飘雪:总之写作很难，难在何处，之一是思维。
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楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">铁树凝:难在先方有可贵后生！思路素材之间有一碰撞修正过程不是一成不变的，中间很多时候有变化。
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) X/ @2 L" L1 {* x# k) W楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">老猫:好标题的灵感从哪里来？老猫的体会是从段落内容中提炼，从个别字词中联想，从上级文件中生发，从参考资料中化用，从交流碰撞中偶得。
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300x180 AD
